“What are you thinking about?”, asked my dad when I was sitting in the balcony on one winter night after dinner. It was cold, the wind slowly making its way into the warm embrace of home. “Nothing“, I replied, like it was the only feasible answer to the question vibrating in the soft breeze. But what was I thinking about? Really nothing. It is hard to explain the empty thoughts. They don’t have a beginning or an end. They are just pointless, random, hazy thoughts dancing around the vastness of the limbo.
“What are you thinking about?”, the very question offsets the balance of the randomness and lets it trip over. Imagine it like this : The random thoughts are tandem walking on a thin wire from one point to the another suspended in the limbo. When the foreign entity such as a question comes barging in without a knock, each thought trips and falls into the darkness. Now, its just empty space and you see the questioning eyes staring at you for an answer, and you have it. “Nothing“. Easier right?
But I would be lying if I really said Nothing. Did I convince you with the explanation, I just made? I was pretty convincing right? Now, let’s rephrase and get to the bottom of the truth. “What are you thinking about?“, the question that has been a constant ring in my ears for a very long time, until I moved out of home for college. But still, it was always there during holidays. Because curiosity. A curious mind always asks questions and now it’s about finding what is actually going on inside the head. But as life happens the thoughts change accordingly and not everything can be answered the way they appear. So, no, it wasn’t nothing that I was thinking about. I was thinking about the miserable life that it is and why it is getting difficult to even breathe properly. And sometimes, it just feels easier to put is all behind and just end it all. Wouldn’t that be easy? At that precise moment, the question makes its way. The thoughts are still there, fresh like the cake out of the oven, but it’s not that easy to explain the magnitude at which the thoughts were vibrating and the intensity of truth they hold. Its’ not easy. But what’s easy is saying “Nothing“. I wasn’t thinking anything. I was staring at the emptiness, the emptiness of life.
because I can spell the alphabets in reverse.
#Day22 #Emptiness #Life
#AlphabetE #TheLetterE #E