Monday, May 18, 2015

The stranger you haven't met. Yet.


The morning is bright and shining its glorious light waking you up from your dreadful sleep. You never gave it much thought. It has always been the kind of feeling, that your mind and heart are at battle over something, which you are not quite sure what it is. You have been thinking, which is unusual. It is not like you don't think, you do think occasionally but you don't think too long on a something or to be precise about her. You are still not sure who she is, what she is, but still, you ponder into the oblivion trying to figure out what is it that you are feeling, what it is that is keeping you awake all night. You saw her a couple of times and you felt the same thing every single time she made her presence felt to your eyes. You are confused. 

You see her again. The first time was more of a glimpse, a blurred image dangling in your conscious and that, which left you sleepless. You are not feeling quite right. Something is happening, is it your mind or your heart? 'Argh',  You let out sigh because you feel that no matter how round the earth might be, there was no way you would be able to see her again. But may be it was your fate or destiny or some similar catch-phrases or perhaps say a miracle, you rub your eyes just to make sure you didn't slide into that small bubble called dream. She was real. She is real. You see her. You forget something, to look away. Your eyes trail her every move. You slowly realize that everything except her is in the colors of two, black and white. She was in bright colors, looking splendidly under the warm morning sun.

She takes a seat across you, but a little far. You have the urge to take a closer look, may be even sit just right across her. But you don't want to give her an impression that girls get when they realize that a guy is creeping up closer. You want to sweep her off her feet with the agility and charm and you realize that you need to work out a bit. You shake the thoughts and drown into the dream like reality. You are awake yet lost. You see the bright brown eyes shining with charm as of there is a twinkle in them and you realize that they are smiling. You watch the  eyes brimming with innocence and which could smile. You have looked at the mirror a million times and your's never did. She takes out her book to read and trails the spoon in the across the edges of the coffee cup. She drowns herself into that book. She is in another place, another world that the book had to offer. She smiles once in a while and your heart melts as if she looked at you smiled. You see the dimples in that brief moment and sink in the candidness of her perfection. You see the curve they make and  you feel the heart racing, beating loudly as if you had sprinted non stop for a very long stretch. Your eyes do the magic of taking it all in, slowly sinking in the beauty as the breaths become heavy.

Your phone rings a couple of times. Probably it was work or some customer care trying to promote their new offers on the network or may be it was your mom checking up on you whether you had your lunch or not. But you are too busy, or perhaps too lost to respond. You slowly notice the soft curls dangling, like a chandelier, bright, think and dark, shining and exquisitely beautiful. May be you are smitten by her beauty that you find everything beautiful, but no. You have never seen anyone like her who would keep your heart racing and on your toes and lost at the same time. You are pushed back to earth when someone stands in front of you obstructing a beautiful view. Your colleague tracks you down and literally drags you to work. You know that it was an important day at work, but you had forgotten about it. You shake your head and embrace the reality. You turn to give her a final look before you dissolve into the crowd hoping that she gives you a peek. You have this weird feeling, churning in your stomach that this will be the last time you will see her. But, hope is all you are left with.


You retire for the day to the same coffee corner after a series of endless seminars, presentations and meetings. You look around. You know that it was pointless, yet that little thing called hope never gives up. He reluctantly sips his coffee re-imagining the afternoon, her. Suddenly, you smell a lavender filled the air and you feel the silk brushing your hand and someone pretty stands in front of you. It was her. You don't believe you eyes. Yet, you don't want to pinch yourself. Even if it a dream, you don't want to end. You sink in the sweetest voice, like an enchantment that is binding you in comfort, while the heart starts racing so fast that you feel like you will pass out anytime soon. You stumble to figure out what was happening around you and she says, "Is this seat taken?" holding her vanilla filled chocolate pastry melting in its warmth. You try to appear calm and coy at the same time while your mind races through a million alternatives to say to her in response and you say "No,.. please .." gesturing her to take the seat. Your mind is now an unstoppable wagon draining out of words to say, to strike a conversation. You come up with a million alternatives yet you don't know where to begin. You curse yourself under your breath. You want to make a lasting impression, but how is haunting you to death. You finally make up your mind and as you try to say it you feel a gentle push on your shoulder, "Is there anything you would like to order", says the waiter gesturing that it was time to close up. You look across your table and the realization weighs you down. You can't believe it was a dream as it felt surreal. You dozed off to her thoughts after a couple of minutes and it had been hours while the coffee became cold. And deep down you feel that there is a chance somehow, somewhere in the near future that you would see her again and strike up the conversation that you have been building up and that the next time you don't doze off.
#IAmYouChronicles
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P.S. : This is a work of fiction. No, it hasn't happened to me. I wasn't describing my experience. Yes, I hope for that to happen someday to me. 

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

The emptiness


Hushed voices echoed into oblivion
The voices, which once spoke volumes
Which once broke the barriers
Silenced in the agony, of life.

Hope was left to scar
Thoughts were pulled into trance
Words lost their purpose
While the voices, what voices?

As the scars dug deeper,
As the expressions felt astray
As the emotions faded into apathy
Mind hushed the reminisce.

Shouted, shouted till the lungs burst
Cried, cried till there were no tears left
God collects your tears, they said
Why did he even give tears?

Light faded in the sunshine
As the sun sprang from the east
Was there even a silver lining ?
In the inane thunderstorms

Empty was the nightfalla
Stars which stopped twinkling,
Stories were left vacuous
The life, the charm that it lost.

- ak
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P.S.: I haven't been writing poetry for a long time now. Hope this doesn't suck as much as I think I would. Bear with me, please. #outOfTouch #Procrastination #bloggersBlock

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

This day...


The gender disparity. Aren't we tired of it, already? I see people judging, passing comments, making rules, banning stuff and taking it up a notch by going social. I just saw a guy taking a picture on his phone standing between two cars in the middle of the road, with no regards for the general public whatsoever obstructing the traffic in the busiest hour of the day and he loves his car, so what? Having a car and a smartphone doesn't make one an ideal person when his intention is to put it on the social media either trying to get "justice" or blame someone. But, but then again there are people whom we call educated, but yet they don't seem so educated. Let me quote my dear colleague who stress on a statement at least once in a day. His statement : "Girls shouldn't be allowed education". So the logical question would be regarding you, "Should you be allowed education?" But you are already educated, aren't you? And it clearly looks like you are not. Not even a bit. 

A few months earlier, there was a debate going on at the corner of the office floor where the ladies were defending their stand while this gentleman (I am being polite here. Sorry. This stupid person who claims to know everything but is actually a dud) decided to voice out his opinions stating that the women are supposed to be confined to homes. 
A valid counter argument was made which goes something like this : 
It could bee dated back to the inception of time that the man is the provider of the family and that women are restricted to homes. In the early days before people started socializing, a family in general needed food for survival. Then it was decided that man would go out to fetch some food since he is physically stronger and also that it would be logical that he would do the hunting while the women would take up the responsibility of protecting the home and taking care of their childred. (So who is the hero here?) As the time drifted it just got imbibed into the minds of the people that women are supposed to be confined to home doing the household chores while the men are the money making machines. And people are still following it as it has been a culture that has been set by ancestors(what? what kind of shit is that?). I mean, I don't understand. With changing time, people are supposed to update themselves staying within the realms of the present, the now. Are we still hunting with stones and sticks? Are we covered in mud, covering ourselves with leaves and animal skin? Haven't we changed? Yes? Haven't we become more social, advancing and improving ourselves woh time? Yes? Then why not the thinking? There are educated people and then there are educated fools. I am sorry to say that the latter aren't educated at all. It would be a disgrace to fools also. When such an argument is made making the men feel a little under the foot, there arises the ego problem. Oh, man and his ego, his superiority status, his heart breaks when a woman beats him, be it anything per say. That hurts self proclaimed ego maniac at the right spots and his response is to defend his age old status with idiotic baseless logics and well of course his stupidity.

The paradigm is that we are moving forward with time but unknowingly stepping backwards by blindly following what our so called ancestors have laid for us, the people who we are consider to be more intelligent than the people we are now. So, this estranged intellectual speaketh his mind. His argument is that it has been told by the so called learned ancestor junta (the society-rules creator or whatever they are called or referred to as) during the inception of creating a rulebook for the society, for the religion for the people of the country. A handbook of sorts that was quite acceptable at that time because firstly, at that time people were divided into different sections based on the work they did, which meant that whatever the people-with-a-feather-and-ink said was imprinted on the rocks and were laid as the foundations for the future generations. Please note that these people were well versed in all books and had knowledge of the umpteenth level. Fast forward to now, that rule book has become obsolete and needs to have some real changeover, like rewritten from the scratch. But... but people still hold it to make a point that their great ancestors weren't stupid to write this stuff down and pass this "knowledge" over so many generations. Nobody was/is calling them stupid, they were intelligent during their time and their confines knowledge at that time can't be used as reference in this time zone hundred of years later. Wake up.

Anyway, my dear colleague had the audacity to say that the girls shouldn't be allowed education and even if they did receive formal education, they shouldn't be allowed to work. And the very same reason he gave for marrying a non-working girl. He actually made it a point while searching for a suitable bride to his parents. And then, he doesn't want to any of the working ladies(sitting all around him) to meet his wife because they would give her new ideas, their share of knowledge on maintaining things and likewise which in turn might back fire at his plans when his housewife decides to start making plans and taking initiative at work. I don't know whether his ego hurts seeing women being independent and successful or what, he is simply unhappy with the whole ladies working breed. When the information about his sister who works for a MNC and earns thrice of what he does is put as a statement, he is mum about it. There has been constant efforts going on around the world to level the gender gap in education, in work place, in a nutshell everywhere. And that is the very reason for implementing the reservation for women to cut down the disparity. No amount of logical arguments could convince an illogical mind which stays adamant on suppressing the opposite gender and confining them to homes. I wonder what he would do if he has a daughter one day. Would he confine to his thoughts by restricting her to education and working, her dreams to be precise. Only Time Will Tell.

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Having said that, its just not this thing that bothers me. These days a lot of things are coming into light, a lot of things are happening which are centered or surrounding women. I can't even begin to describe and comprehend what is happening around and what we have come to. Its just heart breaking. I wish people grew up a little bit. Just a little bit would be a great leap.

PS: There might be a lot of places where you might find things changing drastically from one momentum to another. It is because I haven't been able to write in a single flow( Writer's.. Blogger's block and too much procrastination). So, apologies for that. I need to be more thorough and consistent while writing.

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Decoding.

Less than three.

Disclaimer : No animals were hurt during this post. But a few 'might' get hurt after reading this. Please keep the doctor on speed dail. Any resemblance to anyone/anything alive or dead is coincidental(ie. true). And also, Cigarette smoking is injurious to health. Not that you care. 
Disclaimer P.S : Less than three in "social term"(ie. the language of social media) can be abbreviated as " < 3". Do you understand? Plus, before you go wondering and get lost, mystery : love!
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Let me be frank with you, and if you already know then just bear with me. Love has always been a complicated thing. Though I have never looked for it, I always had this nagging feeling that it just might happen. I was wrong. It doesn't work that way. I was too stupid to realize even after watching a million movies. Speaking of movies, well we will go there in a few stances. But I wanted to understand what it really felt like. So, instead of (again) not trying to find love, I retracted to much easier version - learning from others. Books are a great place to start with. But then I realized I was more of a murderous person, I mean a mystery-adventure book kind of guy. I wasn't a little bit romantic. I failed the first step to understand romanticism, in other words love. Though I haven't had the courage to read many, but I did read a few, I mean two. But then I realized that even if the story is a standpoint of a different person, the feelings and characters, the plot, but I was doing the screenplay in my mind. And as a non-romantic that I am, I censored the creepy parts. Then there were movies which did the screenplay as well, which was cool in a way. But the phrase "non" that was usually appended with a term in my self description which goes in the lines of non-romantic never faded.

However hopeless I was, however impossible it seemed, I still wanted to know. I am human after all. And all humans are romantic, what's wrong with you?! So, in the process of finding true love or atleast love I have come across some pretty interesting stories, assumptions and a few( esp. from the movies) for which I made myself the critic.

a. The critic.
Let me start with the movies, I mean I am a critic now. I recently watched a lot many movies, of which a lot a few turned out be rom-com (Romantic Comedy). I am going to point out to three movies which I felt were in the lines of yours truly (in terms of passion. On second thought strike that). So the central character (hero) is a famous writer who has either published very good novels or have scripted for very successful movies. But they hit the block where they can not move ahead with the story or novel or the script. So, they feel lost and can't even pen a word. *Drum roll* - Another central/lead Character entry -Heroine. The hero as usual is smitten by the girl. They feel the electric pulses when they first make contact. Basically there is a lot of tension between the people. But wait, oh the love does happen, but the girl already has a boyfriend ( a lover, in terms of being a romantic). Oh, that's a bummer. But our hero still doesn't care and makes out with the heroine, passionately of course. (Now, if I were that guy, I mean in Hero's shoes, I would rather respect her choice of "already having a boyfriend" and sulk in my bed or hit a bar or something. But the hero doesn't do any of that) [Critic Expert Comment :  Now, at this point we, as a spectator would love to watch the union of hero and heroine since "he" is the hero and "she" is the heroine and we are definitely wishing for them a happy ending by settling together. But come on, that Biatch(heroine, however cute or sexy) is already cheating and we are just loving it. Why? Because the hero is cute and so is the heroine. So, right on. ] But. But the heroine says she is already engaged or is already in love and that last night was a MISTAKE, which shouldn't have happened and wont' happen. Hero loses faith. His story is stopped again. He smashes things. (Light bulb in his mind) She is the one and he has to get her, at ANY COST. He runs to the airport, catches the last flight which he would have missed if he was a second late, takes a cab and tells the driver to step on it; stops the marriage just in time. They run towards each other, kiss and live happily ever after, I mean "THE END".

b. Wait, what, I mean how ? 
We were a group of six and we used to hang out on weekends and made the most of the weekends, well on most days. It came as a surprise when a friend proposed another friend of mine who was a year elder, which isn't the point. We were on a road trip and this fellow who had been sitting beside me the whole journey seemed to have proposed and I had no idea about it. I came in light of this news a couple of months later. To this day, I still wonder how that happened (beside me)? Now they are happily married.

c. Missed Opportunity
I haven't felt more bad for anyone else. For almost a year, he kept this as a secret, not letting even a hint of lapse. He loved her dearly. You know what, this very guy inspired me in writing a few lines in the lines of romantic. But then he chicken out and said, it was better to let go than pursue and ruin everything that was perfect. So, one year, he kept loving her from afar. I urged him to take a leap of faith and burst that bubble - by which you will at least have the clarity on what to do next. He fought back saying it was better left un-expressed. Recently, he got wind that she was about to be married. I wanted to know how he felt about all that. "No Comment", he said. That was the last, he spoke with me and I with him. I didn't want to push him. 

d. Blood Love.
I made a new friend(now no longer) during the transition from one work to another, though I ended up where I began, literally. She said she already had a boyfriend, as if anyone would pry on her. So, one casual conversation led her to reveal her love story. It started six/seven years ago, when she was in college. Though he is staying far from her now, she was in a long distance relationship. She used to tell me how "protective" he is of her, that he doesn't allow her to go out, that he scolds her whenever she talks with any guy, likewise. That he loved her very much much but never wanted anyone to know about it in college. That his parents would ask a huge sum as dowry and that she didn't have it. That she was getting irritated by her boyfriend. I had to ask her about how it all began. She hesitated to tell, but she eventually told. He, our hero, seemed to have cut his hand pretty bad after he got rejected by her. She being the caring one, took pity on him and accepted his proposal. To which I was not only shocked and thought what kind of a stupid this person is. In her words, " Agar koi aapke liye haat kat leta hai, tho kitna pyaar karta hoga. Isliye haan keh diya" ( Translation : "If someone cuts their hand for someone they like, they must really love the person. That's why I said Yes"). I deemed her mad at that very moment and that guy the stupidest person ever. A few days later, they broke up and she was happy. But she kept telling that he was still cutting his hand / not eating / doing some other drama. Eventually, he wasn't able to convince his parents it seems, she was happy that she was alone again and ready to mingle. About time, right? Now get this, her future husband : Should be atleast an IAS. I was like Pyaar ka tho dhajiya uda diya en logo ne.

e. Don't say a word.
I have this friend who has a girlfriend and who ditches us whenever she calls to meet. The worst part of it all is when he is with us, he is not with us. He is glued to his cell phone as if Fevi Quik accidentally fell on his hands and he was holding the phone. Oh wait, there is another worst part, she is about to be married. While his story runs on endangered fossil fuel, there is another guy who was smitten by "love" so bad that he roamed the city a couple of weeks and then broke up with her when he thought he could do better and have "better" girls. Yes, its a plural. Now, he not only ogles like a maniac, he is eyeing an already married girl. (Oh, thanks for the knife. *Stabs myself*. Because.This.is.where.we.have.come.to.)
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Sometimes, I feel it is better to not get involved in all this love-shuv thing. Because of the people like these. But then again, it is still a mystery to me and I like to solve that. The thing about this so called love is that is that it isn't visible. Well, it is visible if one is hopelessly in love or a die hard romantic at heart, neither of which I can associate myself with. But for a, is it safe to say, stone-hearted person like myself, it is like unchartered territory and it is totally safe to say that it is like an onsite opportunity in my project - never going to happen. Never. Ever. Never. Ever. 

P.S. Dear People-in-Love, I know how stupid and idiotic I might sound right now. But, please don't shower the gyan on me. I will still not understand the complication unless I row that boat myself. So, please spare me. I beg of you.

Friday, April 10, 2015

#ThatSevenThings


Disclaimer : This is not for the faint of heart / stamina. Treat yourself with a bottle of Nimboo ka paani / Coconut water before reading, or I can sponsor you (of course after reading and believe me, you would need it). Extensive use of hashtags (because I can) and random names ( to screw it up for people to read and follow the context). [Pro Tip : Use a notepad and a pencil to keep up. You are welcome]. And ... yeah.. this is my fascination with words and an experiment involving myself as a critic.Let me allow you to be the judge of it. Any relevance to either living or dead or fictional is totally coincidental
Disclaimer P.S. : Red Alert - Don't read if you haven't watch the movie titled : "Fast and Furious 7" or you happen to be a "Die Hard"  fan of it. Yes you, don't, just don't!

#kuchBhi #kuchBhiMovie #FreakingKuchBhi #theKuchBhiMoments

Fiction has always been a fascination. The words that do the magic of converting an idea into a reality for the imaginative mind to ponder around in building a world around its structure. It is just a bliss in a way. I am fascinated by it. As a matter of fact, I even attempted to write some fiction. No, not everything I write here is fiction. Seriously, it is not.I did give it a try a few times. I just couldn't proceed with it. Why, you ask? I didn't have the foundation for the story, a comprehensive proof. Sure, I could make things just around, break things or even bring upon a purple wedding. At the end it should make sense and be justifiable, well like that purple wedding. Most of the South Indian movies could defy physics, biology, chemistry, all you mean to say is "Science", yeah, Science. If you are thinking why I jumped from writing to movies in a beat, it is because I draw information from everything. And the people around me have become monotonous, by which I mean getting married. Speaking of married, what's up with people and marriage. Hot cakes, I say! This year alone I attended five freaking marriages. I mean, umm.. okay, let's leave it at that. So, fiction writing and movies. As I watch the movie, in my head I would be reciting it as if I am reading it, trying to pen down how an author would do if he / she were to write the movie as a book. Now, the main point we are discussing here is logic. I have stopped mid way a lot of stories because I couldn't get the logic right! Yes, the fact that I haven't experienced a lot of things is another debatable topic. But logic, in general. So, here is one story.

The story begins with a classic revenge - the kind of revenge that big brothers take for their younger siblings, in a high end car chase kind of big way. So...

#One : In the process of collecting the information against the people who put the younger sibling in hospital who will eventually end up in a jail, Mr. X kicks the ass of a heavy weight champion, umm supercop. Bham, wham, boom, the supercop guy whooshes out of the window and falls down from a three storey building. He ends up with a fractured hand and a sprained leg. #noScratchsAllowed

Mr. X knows about all the people in the "Hero" gang from the information collected from the supercop's computer and decides to eliminate one by one, or all at a time which ever was convenient. Just as then, he leaves a warning message by blowing their house. The Hero 1 gets hyper pissed off and is determined to set things straight. Meanwhile, the Hero6 gets killed my Mr.X as the other heroes encounter a blast in their home. H1 sets out to Japan, just like that to get his chain, which he had been wearing from the Day 1 of the sries start. How did it even end up there? Well anyway, he is determined to take revenge for his dear departed friend. All the heros attend H6's funeral where H1 senses the presence of Mr. X. He takes out his super car and chases him down into an underpass where they face each other. Wrooom, wrooom. The super cars accelerate signaling for a combat by hood-fight, hood-to-hood. They go at full speed or over 100 miles in like 3 seconds and ram into each other. #NotASingleScratch while the two super cars are now junk after the head on collison. Mr X takes out his gun but doesn't fire ( this would just end the movie, just like that). May be he had the safety on. Or may be he was out of bullets. Spider soldiers drop from no where. Yeah no where. It was a underpass, but well, no big deal there. Mr X escapes.

Superop guy recommends a special task force, an old friend of his to get that Mr X back, who happens to be a kick ass (literally) ex-soldier who was tried to be put down, but it was just next to impossible. The old friend recommends an alternative deal to H1 for his help on something - If he succeeds in bringing the required item, all his soldiers will be at H1's disposal. But H1 wanted his own team. H1, H2, H3, H4, And H5 (H1's {spoiler alert :}wife, but she doesn't know yet) set out to get a person who has created Big Brother, in other terms a Virtual tracking device, which is called Gods Eye.

#Two : The plan was to grab a person from a highly secure transport facility but they couldn't just drive up to there ( They were going green, saving fuel. Wait, they were wasting it. How ? read on ..) They decide to intercept the transport mid way at some point "p" on the map which is the best possible way to grab the person, I mean the hacker person who was still faceless, unknown and a mystery. Instead of driving upto there in their super cars, they decide to para-jump from the aircraft sitting in their super cars. What the whhhaaaaatt...! What the hell was that for? I have no idea! They make a safe landing, well almost everyone, just where they wanted, duh! Machine guns, hook and nook, and human jumps become order of the day. H2 gets into the machine gun infested, heavy vehicle and grabs the package, oops sorry, the person who happens to be a hot girl with curly hair. Mr X finds the whole gang trying to do some stupid stunt. He tracks them down without the help of Gods Eye or any tracking device. This H-gang was sloppy as hell. Our hero gang was risking their life for that Gods Eyewhich was supposed to be used to find Mr X. 

I guess Mr X is a super hero here. He didn't need anything and he was coming at them alone, and he was coming with full force, full guns blazing, armored vehicle like no other. Skid, jump, drag, accelerate - the girl is now with H1, who is being chased by Mr X. H1 eventually manages to cripple Mr. X's vehicle. Just as then H1 along with the hot girl are pinned at the edge of the cliff by the people who were transporting her for the God's eye drive ( They had freaking helicopters and drones equipped with missiles - This was way too high end to be transporting by road!)and eventually they lose the hot girl.

#Three : Now, the hot girl and our H1 are in the car pinned down by the Villains and they had no where to go, except down the cliff. H1 tells the hot girl to wear a helmet, does a 360 and jumps off the cliff. It tumbles down and down and guess what ( you already know, don't you)H1 is literally without a scratch while the hot girl has a few (for namesake) and she happens to be unconscious due to the tumbling down.

Upon interrogation  about God's eye, they realize that the item in question was "supposed" to be safe with the hot girls' best friend since she didn't "trust" anyone else. The hot girl's stupid happened to be in Dubai. So, the Hero gang, the old friend  along with the hot girl (of course) fly to Dubai to retrieve the drive from the best friend. Unfortunately he happens to have sold it. "Take care of it until I come" means sell it to the Prince without telling me. But nothing to worry. He was a Prince, lives in a penthouse with the highest security, the best fastest-bulletproof( this is convenient) car in the world and he happens to have hid the drive inside the car ( What was he thinking in the first place?)

#Four : The hero gang get entry, hack the security camera and are good to steal the drive. But as then someone gets sloppy ofcourse, the Hero(ine)5. The lead security officer is a lady (obviously, right? who wouldn't have a ass kicking heavyweight champion has a personal security guard). An epic (girly/cat) fight with heels-on happens between H5 and very strong security lady, who also happens to raise the alarm of an intrusion before entering into the fight. So the guys who were trying to steal the drive from the secure place are eventually getting trapped. There was no time to waste. H1 and H2 hop into the car and break the wall through the narrow escape on the closing walls just in time. The Prince gets angry and they start shooting at them. Well, the car is bulletproof and no bullets could do any good. Instead of taking an elevator down, they choose to fly out. Yes sir. H1 is an expert driver and he made the whatever-calculations-needed and accelerates the car and rams it through the glass window pane only to land on the adjacent building which was undergoing renovation (luckily). This was a blindest perfect jump ever ( If I were driving that car, I would end up hitting between the two floors and eventually have a flight straight down. May be that's why I am not the leading character).But Houston, we have a terrible problem. The brakes wont work, for some reason. Guys, the costliest, fastest, bulletproof car just for you, oh wait, the brakes might not work sometime so you have to learn to jump out of it. And in order to escape this horror, the H1 again speeds up and takes it through the glass again to the third building where a old monument convention was going on ( on like the 80th floor, who would take all that trouble to take those things up there?). They manage to destroy every piece of it, smash-smash-smash and get the drive out and also manage to jump out of the car just in time while the car takes an express flight straight down. ( Oooh damn. The car which they called Beast is now literally nothing but junk). 

#Five : Now that the worlds greatest tracking device is in hand, they could find anybody in the world in a matter of seconds. Mr X is tracked down to an abandoned factory, of course! The H -gang preps up and sets for a surprise invasion and eventually wither kill / capture Mr X. They set out in the night with lights blazing from the SUV's (that's called stealth mode) only to find Mr X having a nice dinner. PLease note that Mr X is a highly trained operative with no mercy at all and he fast and strong and awesome. They have him right in sight, but can't shoot ( duh! the movie would get over) only to find reinforcements in the form of Villains from whom they stole the package. Fire, bullets blazing, grenades blasting. The God's eye falls from the H-gang, and another member is shot. To rescue him they leave without the God's eye. (They could have just destroyed it instead of leaving it there. They still had the creator who could totally create it back. It's not like she was old and took decades to build it. Remember, she is hot?). What I didn't understand is why didn't Mr. X kill them then and there? It wasn't like they became invisible. They had a dying man and a Black SUV. And they were running away in the night with lights on. Anybody could chase them, literally.

Anyway, the old officer dude was hit pretty badly in the crossfire and tells them they are on their own. So, the H gang want to take it to the home town where they the streets better or whatever! So, the villains track using the God's eye, and even though they have the best tracking software, they still wanted the hot girl.

#Six : A small car chase ends up with H1 facing Mr X in the abandoned parking lot just like the scene an hour earlier in the underpass. Vroom, accelerate, clash! They hit each other face to face with a bit of a twist. While these guys were going head on, the hot girl has a plan to hack her software and take back the control but that requires her to in the close proximity of the God's eye. The twist here is that the Villains were in the chopper and they deploy a drone equipped with missiles. They use the god's eye to pin point their location and shoot missiles at them to kill them? They wanted the hot girl but still they were throwing missiles. They jump out of super cars going at great speed, they switch cars, they do all the stunts that could have been possible. Oh, yeah! Not a scratch. I had paper cuts while eating popcorn. I had to bandage it, literally.

#Seven : H1 finally manages to knock Mr X, and he even manages to place a bag full of grenades on the chopper used by the villains by jolting himself at about 80 degrees angle and falls down. The H gang rush to check him whether he is alive or dead. H2 confirms that he is dead. H5 (the still-not-disclosed-wife-of-H1) finally speaks to him about getting out of coma, umm, no.. it wasn't coma... oh yeah, getting her memory back, which is a miracle actually since there is no "Science" involved for this. H1 finally wakes up from his sleep. Yay! 

Let me break down a little secret here. I am a big fan of Mr X. And that is one of the reason why I wanted him to win this "War". He may be the bad guy! These H-gang weren't any less. 

No more people died. Thank God. Except the 230 cars that were presumably used and destroyed while making. The extravaganza! 


_____________________

P.S. Few things worth mentioning I guess :
a. Yes, #iAmAHashTagFanatic. No, I don't tweet much. I just #Retweet tweets. It is much easier than thinking what to tweet and ending up with nothing to tweet. 
b. Yes, I am a lousy critic. Look at me as a logical person. And no, don't say it is just a movie and it is a work of fiction. Yes, it is. But that doesn't mean anything can happen for the benefit of the movie. At least make it look real.
Friend's Opinion on the movie : "I felt like I was watching an animated movie". Well, that would have made more sense, wouldn't it?
c. If you decide to kill me (for ruining a "supposedly" good movie or whatever) now? Get in line, okay? 
d. There might be a ton of grammatical mistakes. This whole correcting the grammar thing on the internet has messed up my mind. I guess I am remembering all the wrong sentences and assuming that they are right! What the hell, right? That feeling is mutual here. *shakes head vigorously to snap out of it*

#FF7 #Fast7 #FastAndFurious7

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Move on.


Disclaimer : This post has more hashtags than the content. Wait, what content?

#ThisIsNotMe #seriously #youGottoBelieveMe
He stepped out feeling the bright sun warming up in the summer morning, until he broke a sweat and never stopped sweating. Global warming, they say. "Its' getting out of hand", he said as he swiped that sweat on his forehead. He was wearing this what looked like a cap, which looked crazy though. By crazy, please note that it means weird in this context. It was black, well most part of it. It might have been a old one, because it looked faded a bit, discolored and a lot shabby like it hasn't been washed  or a decade. And then it was sparkling, not the good kind, but it was more like Wait-whats-that-now! No it wasn't the diamonds or anything remotely similar, it had these white strips like the one we find on the road which illuminate when light falls on it, something like that. I had to ask him whats up with that cap of his. I even suggested that he could opt going out without that "cap". He stared at me like I committed some dreadful sin and said, "What are you talking about? I don't have a cap on. Its' just my hair".

#bloggerComment #Blogger #twitter #Motivate
A small intermission will fill more energy afresh in your mind". I had to bring this up. The comment went on to say, " So I am sure with new topics and novel ideas you will be on the track". Now, I feel like I haven't been able to meet up with the expectations. The Blogger had been sweet enough to encourage me, like many other on the social media. I was like that crazy person bragging about not being able to write as if that is a good thing. I have seen many people being there to support and offer guidance. They have been really sweet. Where as I on the other hand, still bragging. I feat I might be the most disappointing thing on the blogosphere, even after all that! 

#pact #LetsMeetUp #randomRealization
I always wanted to do this thing called "Lets' meet up". Like when you are high on success or failure or alcohol or whatnot, you look at your friend sitting beside you while you sip that beer and say, "Hey dude, you know what we should do. We should meet at this place ten years from now. No matter what situation we might be in, lets' make it a thing". This sounds so cool, doesn't it? Then I realized I don't drink beer, or alcohol (beer and alcohol belong to the same family, duh!) or success or failure or friends (close enough to make the pact)That's the saddest part. As a matter of fact, I can count on my fingers. 

#marriage #Friends #theDistance
What marriage does to friends, I never realized. A few of my friends got married and are on the way of getting married. And you could clearly see the change when I am eating the whole tub of popcorn alone, when I am going to conventions and concerts alone and feeling like "Let me just get out of this". Believe me, it is no fun going there alone when you are bound to see countless people enjoying in the company of their friends. One year ago, when someone in the group said, "How about a movie this weekend", everybody else agreed to it. Now, the response is like, "I have to go my in-laws house", "I have to go shopping with my wife", "I have to take care of some things at home", and the list just goes on and on. Time changes people, umm, I mean marriage. I am still the same, that's a shocker good thing, right?

P.S. : Just a random update, until I update more of the likes of these. 
"Nooooo"
Did anyone say anything? I couldn't hear it over the sound of my braggings. 

Thursday, March 5, 2015

The beginning of the end.


6 years. 560 posts. 129000 pageviews. 6 years sounds like a pretty big number. But it isn't as scary as I say my age out loud. I am still in disbelief. Why, you ask? Not that it is a huge number compared to the life goal I am supposed to be doing, or partly it does matter. But this that I have survived for so long. I started writing exactly 6 years ago and I don't know how but I just loved it. I loved it so much that I started recommending to other people in my college, my cousins, my cousins friends, even left the blog url on the tissue papers and accidentally ( I mean consciously) left my blog name or the url in the places I had been to. But guess what, no one gave a damn. Seriously, no one. But I didn't care much. I loved writing and hence I continued to do so. 

Then again, I wasn't a reader either. Truth be told, I haven't read a novel or the likes of it till I hit that writer's block in writing down the lane a few months after I got into writing. Yes, I did read most of the Super Hero and all of Tintin comics and that was the last of it. My dad used to buy books, like autobiographies of famous people such a Mahatma Gandhi and Nehru, and the likes of them. He even bought the book 5 point someone, which apparently was doing good at the Crossword book store. But I was rather interested in wait, what did I do in my free time? I guess nothing. There was no internet either and that DSL internet was the shittiest thing one can ever come across, the dail up freaky tone. Anyway, lets not bring the past to the present. So, where was I? Yeah, writing and reading. I started reading because I wanted to know things, I wanted to have a different perspective on things, I wanted to know how the people's mind worked and how they saw what they saw. I followed almost every single blogger whom I came across, and tried to fit into their shoes or perhaps their mind. Believe me, all this drama did teach me a thing or two. And to add to the list, it also gave me a few good, great friends whom I might not have met but know me a far better than any other person I met(in person) along the way. So, thank you for that.

And this year. This year just doesn't feel so right. Something has been off lately. Optimism hasn't really been my strong suit. And neither has planning for something remotely turned out to be okay. So, I decided to not make plans either it is to write or read or anything as a matter of fact and do things along the way as they come to me. Turns out, that didn't work either. It just feels like I am destined to be doomed, in ways not yet known to me. I told a friend of mine, "When I make some plans, everything in the universe tries to stop it. So I decided not to make any because you know since making plans didn't work out. So not making and thinking that I didn't make any might just yield an outcome which in turns benefits me.". So, in light of all these atrocities against me, I have decided to put this blogging on hold for an indefinite time, until noted. May be, I will just start writing from some other place or with a pseudo name or a different blog. I don't know man. I don't know what to do. Anyway, I came up with this quote or whatever we call it. 

"All good things eventually end. And all bad things should have ended sooner."
- Ajay Kontham, 2015

[Analogy : The text is quoted and there is a name below it and there is a year also for reference. Thats' what we call a quote / quotation. And you are welcome for the enlightenment you recieved.]

This brings the post to the end. The end to (refer the quote and pick a choice)
And... you know what it means.

Monday, February 23, 2015

The Limelight.


The song resonated in its rhythm
Filling the corners of the theater
In silence, the audience tuned in
To the melodious brilliance

The mind swayed in the swiftness,
While the soothings hit every nerve
As the intensity of the voice was felt
The gravity of the words sank in

Unbounded by ones' thoughts,
The mind freely fell into bliss
It wasn't just a song, but
A composition of tormented feelings

Stories vibrated in the ambiance
Echoing the pain, the struggle
The world came to a still
As the final song was performed

The people admired in awe
He breathed in the appreciations
Before him was a dream,
A fulfilled lifetime ambition

As the limelight glimmered
Slowly, he opened his eyes
To find himself alone
Standing in the old coliseum.

- Ajay Kontham, '15

Thursday, February 19, 2015

Love Thyself.


When the love is overrated and a lot undermined. And then there are people who becomes experts with "doctorates", as if they know quat. These people suggest not to get into, but what do they know about it. They say they saw, they have been there, they know things. But they haven't been in my shoes. How can they know how it feels, how empty I feel? How can they know that heaviness the heart carries each day? How can they know the pain that something/someone is just that arms length, yet too far away? How can they possibly know? How can they possible relate their story to mine?  And then they say it is the same every where, with every one. It happens the same way, just the journey to begin it is different. Well, something we both agree on.

They don't stop. They say Don't do it. She isn't suitable for you. She is out of your league. You are not qualified. You are dreaming too much. You are this, you are that. But no one in the right sense encourages the feelings that keep eating me inside. Whats with the eating, you ask? The words fail me, as I find myself lost in the normal conversations. The mind remains preoccupied all the time. The thoughts slur. I dig myself into ways to express, to let the feelings known, speak out, or perhaps write. But I am lost. A hole is dug, a deep hole that is filled with emptiness. Emptiness, the feeling that feels the void in the mind, or is it the heart. They say heart. I know its the heart speaking, being a little crazy, a little stupid, for that one person.

Then I finally met her, her vibrant charm giving me goosebumps, as I float in the soft clouds, drifting in the voice, that sweet voice. I want the conversation to go on. But then I realize that I am just babbling, words that didn't make sense. She laughs at my troubles, the smile the melts the heart like the april snow. I smile and continue my struggle to keep up the conversation, just to keep her at my sight, involved in my conversations and perhaps hope for the magic to happen. But time. Time has always been the enemy, the one thing evil I had ever known. She leaves with a smile, giving me assurance to meet again, that we will continue, but some other time. I feel hopeful, but at the same time I feel the emptiness, even though its been just a second. I stare as she fades in my sight as she takes the turn at the end of the corner.

Call me crazy, but I have never felt the void so heavy, the emptiness so dull, the world so monotonic. The void which she fills up when I am in her presence, even if it for a moment. And the heaviness when she leaves. What is this, but not love? I assured myself to complete me. I was ready to take the chance. I knew that a life without her, would be a life lost. I look up in the mirror as I rehearse the script I wrote while the hundred torn pages lie on the floor withered. I feel hopeful as I imagine my reflection as hers and recite that lines that keep playing in my mind. I could find the heart beat fast already. Her reflection in the mirror fades into mine. I see my nervous self, a person torn between the moment that next, and what's tearing him apart, you ask! Perhaps, it is love. And then it hits him. He knows that he would love her, forever. But will she? Will she be able to be like him for the rest of their lives, imparting the same love he feels he has for her. He brushes away the thoughts, shakes himself, adjusts the tie and is about to leave. Then he hears the reflection in the mirror which stops him from taking a step out, his reflection speak, "Love thyself first".
____________________________________

#iAmYou #youAreI #TheCroniclesOfYouAndI

Sunday, February 15, 2015

A question.


I have been asked a question a lot many times these past few months. And I am getting more familiarized with the very question with no good answer. Well, I do have an answer, but this puts in front of me a few more unanswerable questions. The very question could tell almost everything about me, or perhaps give a brief insight about me in a nutshell. If you are wondering what this question is, let's find out. 

The last month had my birthday and the ritual that I follow consists of me going out, spending on food and umm, that's pretty much it. For the past six to seven years, I have been doing the same. So, one of the following days after the "big day", it goes on like this (most of the times) :
What did you do on your birthday?
I went out and had a stupendous meal.
With whom?
I went alone.
*a little perplexed face, probably because they don't know how to react to that while I give an awkward smile*

The weekends after a very busy week, which most of the people eagerly wait. Since the time Monday begins, I look forward to the weekend in anitcipation of doing something exciting. Then again the eagerly awaited weekend finally arrives and those two days shouldn't go wasted in any way. So, I go for movies (sometimes), or to that new restaurant which opened last week, or the new Starbucks Coffee to check what the fuss about the coffee for the high pocketed or if I feel too lazy, to the regular coffee shop. The following day, Monday which everyone of us hate, the conversation goes on ..

How was your weekend? How did it go?
It was okay types. As usual
How was your weekend?
It was okay. I hung out with my friends.
What did you do ? 
Well, I went to watch a movie on Saturday.
With whom?
Umm, Alone? 

I revamped my Camera. You know the karma shit. It is always there to kick my ass, even if I don't do anything to it. My camera had a trouble, for reason unknown. The cost of repair was equal to a new camera. Yeah, karma is a Biatch. When I say revamped, you get the point, right? I took a new one. Though I wanted to take a high end model, then I realized I was a shitty photographer already ( Photography : proof ), so if I were to go for a high end camera, I had to know everything that is to know how to operate a camera, properly. No, I still don't know. Yes, I have been using a camera for 4 years now. Remember, the shitty photographer comment I threw at myself? Anyhow, I revamped that whole thing but I think I am letting it get dusty safely in the cupboard. Instead, I had an idea of going out, somewhere out of the city or perhaps out of the country. [ But then my bank balance : Zero ] *cries harder*. So, I got a lot of saving to do ( don't laugh, please ). But I took the effort to research a few places and decided to go anywhere somehow this very year. My initial plan was to go this very month whilst I will procrastinate. But remember I mentioned something about revamping the camera, the result of which is reflected in the bank balance. My first choice was Mauritius ( did you see the photos? the sea water? just perfect for honing my photography skills). I thought it was somewhere near Lakshadeep Islands. I found out that it is in Indian Ocean but not a part of India, but Africa. So whatever! I am going there. But let me rob a bank first. A few days later, or I guess it was the following day I was in conversation with a friend.

....So, what else?
Hey, you know what? I am planning to go to someplace, out of the city, like Mauritius, Goa or perhaps Leh Ladakh, or anywhere.
But why?
I am getting bored and so I will go there and take some pictures with the new camera. (I think I sounded a little excited).
Okaay. With whom?
All by myself. ( I was getting bored of using the word alone). 


All this while, I had a lot of thinking about this "issue" at hand. I do a lot of things alone. I don't do a lot of other things because I am alone. You see there are both sides. But the scale is heavier on the things I don't do because I am alone. But let's consider the actual scenarios that I am involved with. Going alone to the movie sucks, I know. But what else am I supposed to do when I have a few friends / acquaintances who bias the movie based on ratings, other's reviews, language, the genre, IMDB rating, whatnot. The problem being we consider watching movie an event. Perhaps it should be done something if we are in a company of people and suddenly decide to spend the time watching a movie. But instead, we plan a week ahead, cancel the plan for the day because we got a movie to watch. I do these things spontaneously, and perhaps thats the reason I go alone?

If you want to watch a movie for passing time, just go and watch with friends. Even if the movie sucks, there will be something to get some fun out of it since there are friends involved and friends won't let a boring movie bother us. But, that is not the case with me apparently, if the movie sucks, I have to put on my headphones and listen to songs and wait for the movie to get over like I did today. Oh bloody hell, that movie had no story and it wasn't getting over anytime soon. 

Now the question that stands in front of me is : Where are your friends, AJ? I wish I had a definitive answer to the question. I am not a people person. It takes time for me get adjusted, acquainted, but when I do I could be crazy, crazy enough for you to block me ( No, not exactly! I am exaggerating. Don't block me now!). I do have friends but sometimes they can't make it to everything I might be involved with. It feels like I have friends but then again I don't. The people whom I consider friends are mostly the people I work with. And as you might have guessed, they have they own friends of their own ( from their school, college, likewise ) and they have known them for a long time have attuned to them in a matter of speaking. There may be new people in our lives, but then again there is that old bond that could never go old, no matter the time / distance / whatnot. I have been a migrant, which means I haven't stayed in a single place for a long time. That should have be a good thing, considering the fact that I have had the chance to meet a lot of people which inturn meant that I should have a lot of friends. There is a procedure that is in play when someone ( say a stranger) becomes a friend, then a best friend and then a friend for life. I haven't stayed long enough to complete that process and all I am left with were friends-turning-acquaintances, while some don't even remember me (true story). Perhaps its' just me and there might be is something wrong with me ( which is true which is quite evident,  Iguess). So, its' me in the limelight again who need some (or a lot) changing to do. But isn't it late? It is late sure, but not late enough to start over. I say this to myself that from tomorrow I will be doing things differently. But the tomorrow turns to hundred another tomorrows and ten years from now, I will be writing this very post again, with a different example. But let's not lose hope, right now ! 

Until later.